the ceiling

The drive home isn't so bad tonight
Warm wind through the window
Orange sun through the tinted glass
But the feeling is still with me

Read the evening paper
The world seems ready to fall apart
But it somehow stays together
I know the feeling

I climb into bed and pull the covers 'round
Close my eyes and try to fall asleep
But then my thoughts begin to fly
And my life is suddenly under the microscope

I stare at the ceiling overhead
But I don't see the plaster, only shadows
Light filters in through the blinds
Hung over the window into my past

How old am I really? Where have the last ten years gone?
All the things I could have done
All the things I should have done
No way to turn back time

Panic sets in as I try to grasp
At the time I think I have left...
I will never have more time
Than I have right now

Will I meet someone to share my life?
Will I leave my mark on the world?
Will I live the rest of my life to the fullest?
When my parents die will I be able to carry on?
What will my children be like?

I can't bear the idea
Of everyone moving on with their lives
After I'm gone
I want to see what happens next